The Saboteur

Lying dormant within, this sly critic disguises itself as the voice in our head that decides to show up, crash the party, and tell us we're not good enough.

It makes it's debut in the form of resistance just as we're about to start a creative endeavor. 
It thrives off of procrastination.
It has a middle and a last name. Fear and Doubt.
It decides to flare up and give its spiel on the top 10 reasons why you shouldn't take the new opportunity that will allow you to soar to new heights.  
It shows up in the form of addiction.
If we're not careful and present, it can grow in strength like a tropical depression that turns into a category 5 hurricane destructing everything on our path.

Yet... it can be our biggest teacher in achieving empowerment. The ones that have figured out how to befriend the Saboteur are the ones that have learned to take ownership of their personal power. The Saboteur still resides within them, but they have learned to become the witness of it and know they are separate from it. It is a part of them, but it isn't who they are. So when the moment arises, and the Saboteur appears: pay attention to "it", watch what it wants to do in those moments when you're on the verge of a breakthrough (small or large), accept that it exists (no point in trying to push it away), know you are separate from it, stand up to it and say "meh...not this time", and carry forward. When it's time for it to make it's next appearance, you'll know what to do. Onward.

Things that inspired me this week...

• The random acts of kindness I see on the streets. I was walking home on Tuesday and saw a woman trip and fall on the street, and she wasn't moving. She took a hard fall, and I ran over to her. Two random men came out of nowhere and helped me get her up. Thankfully, she was ok.
• The two friends I had dinner with last Friday night who were running the NYC marathon on Sunday. They're in their 60's. Incredible.
• The guy who's working a full time job that he's struggling with while trying to get his startup off the ground with what little time he has. It's his passion, he's hustling, and he's doing it to make his 3 month old son's life better. 
• The little one that comes by our work to help us get out of our heads for a bit. She lights up the room and puts a smile on everyone's faces. 
• The first person I happen to see racing the NYC Marathon was a person in a wheelchair. Jaw dropper. 
• The Fall and the changing of the leaves
• The "I love the subway story" by a good friend. Moral of the story: Be careful of your energy you bring to each situation.
• Music!
• The person I saw wearing the "I Love Park Slope" shirt. I do too. 
• The person who found the silver lining in a tough situation. 

What inspired you this week?

One of My Favorite Calls of the Year

A good friend of mine, and I have adopted a tradition where we schedule a "year in review" call. It happens at the beginning of January each year. The whole point of the call is to discuss what transpired in both of our lives the year before, and what we want to achieve in the upcoming year. Let me back track though. 

The idea started to percolate during the last quarter of 2012. Our lives were going through some pretty dramatic changes so we were checking in with each other every 2-3 weeks. At one point, my friend offered up the idea to schedule a call at the beginning of 2013 to see where we were at to take an assessment of things. When January 2013 came around, we hopped on the phone and summarized what took place from 9/12-12/12. We chatted about the direction we wanted our lives to go in, and made some goals for 2013. As the year went by, we touched base throughout the year to catch up on the phone - I would say once every 2-3 months. We spoke about our celebratory moments, the challenges we came across, the miraculous things that happened, etc., and we would make notes and save them. Come January 2014, we looked back at 2013 and were pretty amazed at what transpired. Things really changed for the both of us in 2013 in comparison to the last quarter of 2012.

It's been a great reflection tool. Too often, we get so caught up in the busyness of life and it just passes us by. This call really helps shed light on the things you're accomplishing, what areas you're struggling in, how you can better yourself, and allows you to give yourself a pat on the back for the breakthroughs and wins you made during the year. 

I highly recommend finding a close friend who is very supportive, honest, and can view your situations from non-judgmental eyes to do this call with. It works really well this way. Beware of the fun and interesting progress you're going to notice you make. It’s neat to see how things unfold. Also, it's incredibly helpful to schedule the day/time of the call in advance so it's already set on both of your calendars. Drop me a line and let me know how it goes in January!

Have a great week!
M.D.